Earthworld

[Original blog post on Tumblr: January 27th, 2017]

Some highlights of the last EDA I’ve read (Earthworld).

I took these screens while reading, along with my reactions. As usual, this is full of spoilers.

This is exactly what everyone needed after the Earth arc, and especially after Escape Velocity and Anji’s lackluster characterisation. She’s reintroduced in this book, and what a wonderful addition to that TARDIS team! And the book tackles the topic of Dave’s death, where the previous one kinda refused to do so before sending Anji directly into space.

Come to think of it, the book tackles a lot of things it didn’t have to, and succeeds, too. Eight’s responsability in the destruction of Gallifrey constantly threatens to make a comeback in his mind. The issue of Fitz being a copy of the original Fitz is discussed at last - a thing all the books since Interference failed to do properly (including The Ancestor Cell). Come to think of it, Earthworld might just be the best Fitz book so far, which is a baffling thing to me considering that’s his twentieth book!

The plot itself is mostly a good runaround in an amazingly fun setting - it never really threatens to be more than that, but it’s still pretty refreshing. It’s a great standalone book, a fun romp, a very good character piece ; it works on nearly every level. What a breath of fresh air. 8,5/10

---

My bad, I seem to have picked the novelisation of An Unearthly Child.

We’re only on page one and I’ve already laughed out loud once. Good sign.

I just had a flashback of the scene from Memory Lane where Charley tries to use a mobile phone, and I imagined these two dorks trying to have a conversation over mobile phones and I’m giggling

Also Anji thinking Fitz and Eight are embarrassing idiots gives me life

This is a 3 out of 10 on the scale of Bad Ideas.

WE’RE ONLY THREE PAGES INTO THIS STORY AND I’VE ALREADY SAID “IDIOTS” THREE TIMES

Oh my god Eight

Thank you for your precious contribution Doctor

FITZ NO

Are you telling me that the Doctor can only use the sonic as long as he’s distracted and babbling about special interests now

Because that really speaks to me as a person

Meanwhile Anji is trying to cope with Dave’s death by writing him emails and this shouldn’t be that funny

Oh no he still has some memories of Sam and he doesn’t realise it

Okay so I need to make this t-shirt right now immediately

One thing I don’t really like about the writing is that some dialogues are entirely one-sided. It’s not the best example, but in some scenes you only get half the dialogue and it’s very strange.

We’re all very happy for you Doctor but why are you so happy about that

OH SHIT HAHAHA that’s a great idea!

Wait a f█cking second

Is this some sort of Disneyland very loosely based on Earth

I love you Anji

That girl must be a New Who fan who calls Ten “the second Doctor” probably

I probably should smile but I’m actually sad

That coat has only a few hours left to live & I have zero doubts about this

Here’s a better example of what I was saying earlier about having only one side of a dialogue. It makes scenes shorter, true, but it’s very distracting.

I’m laughing but I’m also pretty sure people from 3000 years ago would laugh their asses off if they could see some of our reconstructions of their lives

I still love you Anji

1) A++ description of McGann’s voice

2) That last bit was Not Okay

Also here’s Anji trying to determine which Jungle Book character suits the Doctor best and it looks like a long shitpost

First I laughed about Fitz being the orang-utan, and then I remembered that character really wants to be human and I abruptly stopped laughing

You were on Earth and you didn’t see Blade Runner when it came out? Aw

“he mentally kicked himself for not even being able to look at a babe without thinking of the Doctor” I’m screaming

How did you guess

Only every three months?

Considering it’s been 30 books since Seeing I, and taking into account the fact that I almost wrote “TOO SOON”, we can safely assume that I will never, ever be over Seeing I

I absolutely love this conversation, and also sky-blue pink is still a color, just an impossible one, and it’s quite pretty

Holy sHIT TALK ABOUT MOOD WHIPLASH

OH NOOOO, HELP, CUTE

THIS SHOULDN’T BE THAT F█CKING FUNNY

HE JUST SLIPPED IN THE DAMN BLOOD WHY AM I LAUGHING SO HARD

Unfortunately this is what popped first into my mind before the most logical explanation for their names

9847221° friendly reminder that I absolutely love Eight

FITZ NO

This book makes me laugh way too often this isn’t fair

Oh the indignity

Fitz no. Just. No.

I just choked on my cereals

1) They think Aristophanes plays are cookbooks and they aren’t even questioning this, like, how does that fucking work

2) Fitz once got trapped in the classical section of the TARDIS library

3) for two days

4) for two DAYS

5) and decided to read old plays just in case there was some sex scenes in them

holy shit

there’s genuine tears of laughter in my eyes

This book is quite the emotional rollercoaster isn’t it

Okay so that explains quite a few things. Fitz is with the originals, then.

THIS IS WHAT YOU GET FOR TRYING TO CONVINCE PEOPLE YOU’RE A ROCK STAR FITZ KREINER

I shouldn’t be laughing so hard

I’m still laughing but I’m also so happy for him

Live the dream, Fitz, live the dream

Well except it wasn’t technically you, except it was, except it wasn’t

HOLY SHIT ARE WE FINALLY GOING TO ADDRESS THIS PROPERLY?!

NOT

F█CKING

ALLOWED

OUCH

Addressing a disturbing trend in SF! Good!

Well to be fair, theropods are sorta like big swans

1) Eggy-put Zone

2) Dozens of cats

Hey wait a f█cking second that’s not the same sphinx okay that’s a whole different mythology, also I’m laughing again, this book is probably adding quite a few extra months to my lifespan

Friendly reminder that I love Anji

Which would definitely work on you, Doctor, just a reminder

Meanwhile, in Not Okay Land

At the moment? Not much

I... sorry there’s a thing in my eye

I’m so happy for him

HA HAHAHA

SPOKE TOO SOON F█CK

Back to a place I haven’t been to in a long time, aka “want to hug Fitz and rock back and forth” street

Meanwhile Fitz is doing the same thing to a small crocodile

STORY OF MY F█CKING LIFE

Listen Eight I'm still not ready for The Turing Test references at this point and you’re making me really sad so please stop

Here’s a quick update on the “Johannes loves Anji” situation

Keep this poster for the TARDIS

Something is extremely wrong

Meanwhile, in “Eight finds new and interesting ways to hurt himself”

Oh so that Fitz was an android, then.

Every time I think this book can’t get more bonkers, I’m proven wrong

I would pay money to see a tv version of this damn scene

I shouldn’t laugh but I can’t help it

“HE WAS GOING TO HAVE TO PAY ATTENTION TO WHAT HE WAS DOING WHILE HE WAS DISTRACTED”

Unexpected Dark Eyes: The Great War feels

WE HAVE A WINNER, FOLKS

I DON’T THINK FITZ IS EVER GOING TO BEAT THAT AS FAR AS “EMBARRASSING MOMENTS” GO, THAT ONE PUTS “GETTING MUGGED BY A UNICORN FOR A CHOCOLATE BAR” TO SHAME

His life is so full of horrible things that his only reaction to being locked up in a cell with a corpse is “at least it’s not rotting yet”.

Oh shit they found about the TARDIS that can’t be good

“Nothing good could possibly be called ‘the machine’”

NOT. F█CKING. OKAY.

This is stressful but also fascinating??

Good. Good.

You’re not telepathic Fitz Kreiner so I doubt she got all that

I completely forgot he had lost his trousers and now I’m laughing again

Told ya

You can’t swim? You can’t swim?? You go through time and space and you can even spacewalk but you can’t swim????

Anji is unexpectedly strong

I’m so happy he still remembers Iris on some level even if he couldn’t recognise her in Father Time

1) Hugs

2) Hugs are good

3) Anji huddled in Eight’s velvet coat

4) “he seemed to count in her head as another girl”

Filed under “need to draw at some point”

Marlin and Lancelet

I have no words

Eight plays “Marlin” because of course he is

Also I’m not screening everything but Anji was brilliant

BAD IDEA

VERY BAD IDEA

9 OUT OF 10 ON MY SCALE OF BAD IDEAS

FOR ONCE I AGREE WITH FITZ

NOOOOOOO

This is so damn weird. Funny and stressful at the same time.

Eight is reliving the memories of the dead queen and it is so f█cking weird

In a good way but still

YES BUT I DON’T WANT TO ALARM ANYONE BUT THEY WERE STILL CONNECTED TO THE THING SO I EXPECT SOME SIDE-EFFECTS

HAHAHA

Also “to Fitz’s incredulous horror”

Uh guys

Guys if he thinks he’s dead now, shouldn’t you worry about that or something

I told yoU GODDAMMIT

“quietly pleased”

Oh, that explains quite a lot, actually.

I just realised Anji’s was only coping thanks to pure adrenaline and constant distractions since Dave’s death and she’s inevitably going to crack sooner or later once everything is solved here.

AND STRAIGHT BACK TO THE BAD IDEAS

Hmmm cute?? Not acceptable? Thank you

The TARDIS did a very good job and all is well.

Every time that happened before, that person died, Fitz

Crisis averted.

I’m getting surprisingly emotional about all this

Well I’m really f█cking sad now

Don’t make me cry please Anji oh no

The butterfly room is still there but is now empty after all the butterflies were nailed to that door in The Ancestor Cell and I’m getting teary but also kinda happy, this feeling is extremely confusing

A++ ending, goddammit that last scene was wonderful