Dreamstone Moon

[Original blog post on Tumblr: July 6th, 2015]

Some highlights of the latest EDA I’ve read (Dreamstone Moon).

This isn’t exactly a review, more like some sort of retroactive liveblogging, since I took these screens while reading, along with my reactions.

 

This one is quite good. Loved the worldbuilding, loved the imagery, loved some of the alien characters (Aloisse!!). The story itself was a bit predictable, but that didn’t stop me from holding my breath whenever a character was running out of air. That happens a lot in this story. 7,5/10

Off to a good start. This is Anton, he’s a professional dreamer and he isn’t very good with technology.

Also, he’s having terrifying nightmares.

SAM STOP GIGGLING YOU’RE RUNNING OUT OF AIR

Do you really want to use your last breath to say “put me down” when you are possibly being rescued?

The tentacled creature is Aloisse. She’s got one eye, tentacles, and she’s huge. She’s also an environmentalist. When she laughs, it sounds like an earthquake.

You know what isn’t cool about this character? NOT A GODDAMN THING.

I wasn’t kidding when I said there were a lot of cool aliens in this book.

Well maybe we look like we’re constantly poking our computers to get their attention

Sorry Anton but if I google something nowadays and only find 128 results for the thing that means the thing IS REALLY REALLY RARE OKAY

Did I mention all the cool worldbuilding? I think I have.

Don’t worry Anton, he’s just using Google Translate.

ANTON PLEASE GET OUT OF HERE

DID I MENTION ALL THE COOL WORLDBUILDING

“The library had stopped being cooperative”

I just love the TARDIS okay

Can I try some please? Please

Well maybe because they were built to human specifications and not to giant friendly octopus specifications

DID I MENTION ALL THE COOL WORLDBUILDING YET

So we already know the name of the band it will be cool to hate in the future, apparently.

I will probably like their stuff

Also, Anton’s girlfriend happens to be some sort of sentient cat.

I’d say Anton is racist against aliens but again, his girlfrIEND IS AN ALIEN CAT

This is complicated.

Meet Kekkikk and Kekkikk the Arachnons. I like them. Also they want to wait before getting married because that means one of them is going to be killed and eaten by the bride.

Touché

…

…

Is that a shOT AT JIM MORTIMORE

WHAT A SURPRISE RIGHT

“Like an abandoned child”

I shouldn’t be laughing so hard but I am.

But what, Anton? Do you really want to say “but you’re a lady” to a person with arms big enough to lift you off the floor? Do you?

So in five years we’ll have bowlboards. Looking forward to it.

[Note from 2022: I want a refund]

Yes I’m sad for Kekkikk and Kekkikk

But this is still really cool okay

We need a word for racism-against-aliens. Let’s say “specism”.

That was specist, Sam.

This story is looking more and more like Kill the Moon.

That moon is alive, isn’t it?

GOOD JOB SAM YOU’VE KILLED SOMEONE AGAIN, EVERYBODY TAKE A SHOT IF SAM KILLED SOMEONE AND REGRETS IT

They have found each other again!

How much do you want to bet something horrible is going to happen in 3, 2…

I KNEW IT

IT ONLY TOOK ONE MORE LINE I’M NOT EVEN KIDDING AT ALL

Also of course this dork isn’t dead but of course he’s injured and of course he’s going to joke about it.

This is painting rather beautiful pictures in my head and since I have a full 3D IMAX brain, I love it

Yes good

THERE’S A FORMAT FOR DREAM FILES, I’M SCREAMING, A++ JOB FROM THE AUTHOR PAUL LEONARD HERE

My god the imagery is so beautiful 

NO ALOISSE

OH MY GOD PLEASE SOMEONE HELP ALOISSE

The Doctor speaks Krakenite! I guess that’s one of the languages the TARDIS can’t translate. Also, “song of identity”, oh wow.

Yes good²

MORE BEAUTIFUL IMAGERY

I MADE A LITTLE HAPPY SOUND WHILE READING THIS OH MY GOD

Yes so the moon is alive, that was kind of easy to guess actually. But it’s a very poetic idea.

NO NO NO NO NO ALOISSE NO NO NO

ALOISSE IS BLIND NOW

I WANT TO PUNCH EVERY SINGLE MARINE IN THIS STORY I HATE YOU ALL

Read this paragraph again, please.

Being under the Moon with a Dream artist to prevent Marines from killing the Moon: only in Doctor Who, people.

YOU’VE MADE THIS MISTAKE BEFORE DON’T MAKE IT A SECOND TIME

GOOD

Sam

You know you’re talking about Eight, right

The Doctor who sometimes kisses people just because he’s happy, right

I mean according to Enemy Aliens Charley even had to learn how to dodge him because “he meant nothing by it”, so that shouldn’t be a problem, right

OH NO YOU DIDN’T

Because he was remarkably non-genre-savvy in this story?

That was the most poetic death so far in these books.

Also, Eight has just convinced Anton to kill himself, basically. Good job Eight. You bastard.

I TAKE IT BACK

HE HELPED ALOISSE RECOVER HER EYESIGHT HE’S AWESOME OKAY

Sadly, there won’t be a giant friendly octopus aboard the TARDIS.

That won’t stop me from drawing it, though.